I felt safe

even with the doors unlocked

now you're gone

and I wonder

forsaking all deadlines

I find it overwhelming

taking care of mom

I love you, mom

I love it when I'm driving somewhere

it's getting dark and gray

and the clouds decide to entertain me

Sending Love and Strength

christchurch earthquake

even the dandelions

quiver

a river of stones #31

the end

only

the beginning

1/31/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #30

As we were leaving, a cold fog rolled in and a fresh layer of snow clung to the warm timbers, gracefully lacing green pines with ice and frost, composing a monochromatic landscape that was very hard to leave behind.

winter wonderland

the fog in between the trees

where gnomes and fairies live

1/30/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #29

halfway through winter

every single oak leaf

now in my garden

1/29/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #28

CAREGIVING

Trying to remember what it's like to worry about nothing more important than which team will win the Superbowl.

mother

still not not happy

living at the Ritz

http://helpguide.org/mental/depression_elderly.htm

1/28/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #27

I spent the whole day without electricity because I forgot to mark on my computer calendar a planned ten-hour maintenance outage in my neighborhood that was to start at seven in the morning. Totally unprepared with a full days work ahead of me, I was left with a half-charged cell phone and a set of car keys to get through the busy day. The partial to-do list I made the night before was as follows; pay bills, wash all sheets, work on taxes, clean master closets, catch up on emails, catch up on writing deadlines, send e-cards out for Mom...all to do with using electricity.

I didn't realize how dark the inside of closets were or how many times a day I actually turned on a light, or, how dependent I was on the coffee maker. It was frustrating at first but I opted to turn the phone off, hang the car keys up on the hook, and see if I could manage a productive day without any modern day conveniences...save the porcelain goddess. I was lucky that the weather was unseasonably warm.

By the end of the day I found that I rather enjoyed the surprising change in my schedule and wrote down a revised list of to-dos; garden, read, sit on the swing and write with pen and paper, garden some more, watch a spider work its web, take pictures of the spider working its web, learn how to make a pot of coffee on the bar-b-que, start enjoying the outdoors like I used to.

I learned a few things things that surprised me and thought a lot about how frustrating it must have been for all those who have gone before me.

electricity
wondering what in the world
they did without it

1/27/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #26

mid-winter
the hills so green
you'd think it was spring

1/26/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #25

At sixty miles an hour it takes ten minutes, three oldies but goodies, and hundreds of memories to drive the ten mile stretch of freeway from one end of San Clemente to the other.

some velvet morning
I remember you
in dreams

1/25/2011 Stevie

Nancy Sinatra & Lee Hazelwood 1967
Frank Ifield 1962
Roy Orbison 1963

a river of stones #24

ASSISTED LIVING, the Golden Years

I watched from the doorway as the nurse pushed Mom in her wheelchair, through the hallway towards the dining room. Then I noticed him, again. The tall dapper old gentleman with the gold knobbed cane. He paused and watched Mom until she was seated in her chair at the ladies round table, then gave a big smile, tipped his hat and walked on to the elevator.

bird of paradise
how clever
is his dance

1/24/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #23

This morning I got lost in a an autostereogram and didn't get back until dinner.

the things
you really want to do
daydreams

1/23/2011 Stevie

.

a river of stones #22

Sending congratulations and condolences to two friends in one day. Only the waning moon holds the secrets to our earthly emotions.

a rose bud

blossoms

then dies

1/22/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #21

In a rare moment of boredom, I tried to see if I could hide from my dog. She found me all twenty-seven times.

unconditional

the way you are always happy

when you see me

1/21/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #20

Today, I learned how easy it was to press the 'off' button on my cell phone, house phone, Blackberry, iTouch, fax machine, computer...

peace and quiet

letting all the air out

when you exhale

1/20/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #19

The last love poem I wrote was about a homemade apple pie.

40 years later
he still serves me
the bigger slice of pie

1/19/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #18

Today on the freeway, I decided to give Patience a try, and found the situation easier to handle when she was driving instead of me.

1/18/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #17

The day before your birthday, all day long, you are a year younger than you are when you wake up the next morning.

1/17/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #16

I felt like doing nothing today and nothing consensually obliged, without complaint.

1/16/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #15

My white Go-Go boots still fit so I wore them as I sipped on an old bottle of Red Mountain wine and danced to forty Beatle songs in front of a mirror that revealed my true age.

1/15/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #14

How wonderful it is, the first day of an illness that you actually start to feel better.

1/14/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #13

Working late at my desk, I hear the echoing whistle of a train in the distance. I close my eyes and slip into the caboose. A porter brings me a hot cup of Earl Grey as I lie on a red velvet lounge next to a picture window and watch green pastures go by.

1/13/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #12

How quickly my lawyer whittles down sentences and paragraphs when it comes to discussions. A talent I feel most barristers obviously possess. During the break I asked her if she had ever been interested in or tried writing haiku or short poems?

"No." she simply responded.

1/12/2011 Stevie

down the mountain

through the clouds

back to reality

a river of stones #11

Tonight

driving up the coast

I was in the middle lane

of a five lane hiway

going the speed limit

plus eight

and noticed

all of the egos

that passed me on the right

at 85 miles an hour

were BMWs

1/11/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #10

I clearly see his round baby face as he blows out forty-two candles...happy birthday, son.

1/10/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #9

Wasting time has no sound or energy, it just stares back at you with a blank face.

1/9/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #8

A hummingbird whizzed by so close to my face, I smelled its honeysuckle breath and thought I heard it whisper my name.

1/8/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #7

Even frowns turned to smiles as we watched the sun set at Salt Creek.

1/7/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #6

Today, your shirt was the same blue colour of the sky and for a moment I saw you fade into the clouds.

1/6/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #2

I noticed her big blues eyes

slightly shift to the right

when I told her

that little white lie

even though she's only six

I knew

that she knew

I was lying

Then her eyes pierced mine

looking deep into my soul

and I was forced

to tell her the truth

Yes, Olivia

there really is

a Santa Claus

1/2/2011 Stevie

a river of stones #1

On my way home

an old 60s song

comes on the radio

I'm sixteen again

this time

I'm driving a Benz convertible

with the top down

I have money in my pocket

and

I do not

have to be home

by eleven

1/1/2011 Stevie

THE SKY

The sky holds my mood captive

entangled in folds of burnt amber

tossing about my fury, my wrath

that threatens to dissipate into the blue yonder

ever changing directions and patterns

as the north wind sees fit

never minding my need to settle flames

that singe and destroy, releasing the charge of blame

for myself onto others

holding out, holding on

as the sky just giggles at times

at the waste and neglect

of such a beautiful winter sunset

©2010 Stevie Strang

One more day and the writing begins...NaNoWriMo 2010

"Here, take a picture of this!" said the Sky

losing count

of all the food recalls

remembering

grandma's

victory garden

Got An Email From My Bank....EIEIO

Got an email today from my bank

Telling me

That my overdraft was used.

Called my bank

Told the polite man on the other end of the phone

That I did not have an overdraft

And did not remember authorizing his bank

To take any money

Out of any of my accounts

That his bank so generously opened for me

Four years ago, with no monthly service charges,

As advertised.

I asked the polite man why his bank

All of a sudden

Was charging a service fee,

Pretty much behind my back,

When so many other banks were not?

With confidence, the man politely said

Let me take a look, let's see

Twenty-five dollars was transferred from one account

To cover a monthly service charge on your other account.

I stopped him and said

Didn't you hear me

I don't pay monthly service charges

As advertised, by your bank.

Then, I noticed another fee

For thirty-five dollars

And asked

What is that fee for?

And he said

That fee was for using your overdraft.

Hmmm...

Now, let me get this straight

Your bank took money

Out of one of my accounts

That I rarely use,

To pay for a monthly service fee

That was never disclosed to me,

And then your bank

Charged an outrageous overdraft fee on top of that?

The nice man did not speak.

I continued,

Thieves go to jail

For taking money out of bank accounts

Without permission.

This is so wrong

Especially since your bank just got bailed out

Of an imploding debt with my taxes!

Still no comment from the nice man.

Now, a bit agitated, I told him

I do not have an overdraft

I do not want an overdraft

I do not need an overdraft

And your bank does not have my permission

To ever use an overdraft.

I know it's not your fault, you are just a puppet

But, please, Sir,

Remove the thirty-five dollar fee

Your bank imposed on my account

And put back the twenty-five dollars

Your bank illegally took out of my other account

Immediately.

You can also tell your bank

That this type of behavior

Is exactly the reason

Why this Country

Is so very angry

And will not

Take it

ANYMORE!

fireworks

explaining the word 'freedom'

to the grandchildren

New Haiga accepted for the fantastic Ezine, "Ink, Sweat & Tears"

Removed to submit

New Short Story Non-Fiction by Stevie Strang

The new issue of

ECLECTIC FLASH

is available to read online

or "clutch in your hands"!

http://www.eclecticflash.com/

Page 29

"The SWEATER" by Stevie Strang

World Poetry Day

Can I...
catch a ride
away from here
take me somewhere
very dear
to my heart
and my soul
do it now
make me whole
free my mind from
this weary rot that
inhabits my brain
and makes it clot
fly me to freedom
this very date
and release me
from deadlines
that are
always
late.

Happy Spring!

I

cannot

believe

the

man

over

there

with

the

gray

hair

is

my

son

There are days when...

There are days when

I just want to sit on lake's shore

reading, writing poetry

while sipping on a warm cup

of Earl Grey tea

watching the ducks

flitter about their play

and reminisce about long lost loves

Then, there are days

that I just want to go to Haiti

and do what I can to help.

...it's complicated

No one ever said it was easy
we go up, we go down
around and around
can't quite figure out how we got there...
need to take the time to stop, listen and learn
in the end it will always turn out
one way or the other
and if it doesn't turn out
the way you expected
then turn it into a piece of art,
frame it, so you'll always have it
to look back on, and remember
to never go that way again.

Thanks for the lesson Dad.

Happy New Year Everyone!

Today's sunset...

Accepted for publishing

All Of This - Accepted for publication

53 More Days to NaNoWriMo!

In A Hurry - Accepted for publishing

time..
not enough for me
too much for the prisoner
what's the difference?

sometimes
the insignificant
things in life
add
to the beauty
of what
really is..

newborn twins
already
in sync

Going Through Photos - Accepted for publishing

The Setting Sun - Accepted for publication

Hey B, wake up, someone's here...

"Hey B, in a few days we are outta here!"

"Don't feel bad, they think I'm fake too." said the Parrot.

under the circumstances
I think our visit went quite well...

another hot sultry day

feeling a bit restless

and caged up..

4th of July
red white and blue
everywhere

father's day
the sound of dirt

on your coffin

still fresh

in my mind

Our Father...

Three carnations land softly,

perfectly, into folded hands

praying, offering absolution for a soul

gone wrong, remorse with epiphanies

and forgiveness, anxious to mend

and correct the error of his ways...

the eleventh hour hastening

skeletal limbs into the inevitable fate

of closure for all things

past and present, leaving a future

full of doubt and confusion

eight-fold, and painful

to sort the meaning of why

and how an atrocity, such as it was,

could have been disregarded

by all until the last unfortunate moment

of life, forever silencing words

that were yet to come

and the peace, and the happiness

we all longed to finally own.  

Unaware of what is to come by the end of this month.

Script Frenzy

Day 2 of Script Frenzy and I am still on the third page. Not good. My plot keeps turning to murder and I wanted this to be a comedy!

EMMY DUCK

It was hard to bring a pet back into my life after the horrific experience I went through watching my three pets succumb to tainted pet food a few years ago. But, this little kid came into my life very suddenly and unexpectedly. She found me at the most perfect time, in the most perfect form, and under the most loving circumstances. Fifteen years ago we named our new puppy Oscar, because we got him on Oscar night. He was definitely a prize and we dearly miss him. So in honour of Oscar, we named this little cutie, Emmy. I guess the next one will have to be called GeeGee (that's what we called my Grandmother)...for Golden Globe?

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

TWO YEARS AGO TODAY...

Two years ago today I lost my beloved black cat, Kiki. It seemed like all of the sudden she became lethargic, couldn't keep down any food or water, and became listless within a few days. I took her to the Veterinarian and had to leave her for a few hours so they could take tests and examine her thoroughly. When I returned I could not believe what the doctor told me.

"Her kidneys are failing and you need to put her to sleep." she said.

"Her kidneys are failing from what? I started to panic.

“Her age maybe? She is almost eleven years old and in cat years that’s….”

I cut her off, “In cat years? She was perfectly fine a week ago!”

I was devastated and torn with having to make such a final decision. Instead, I chose to take her home for the night and get another opinion the next day because I didn’t believe she was that sick. It happened so fast.

Kiki didn’t hide like I have seen other animals do when they were sick. She wanted me to hold her, so I did, and spent the night on the bathroom floor with her. She wasn’t hungry and wouldn’t take any food, but she was terribly thirsty. I held a small bowl of water to her mouth because she was so weak and couldn’t hold her head up. She lapped up almost all of the water and then wiggled out of my lap and threw up every drop she had just taken in. She looked up at me and then slowly wandered back to the blanket I had put down for her. I noticed that her hind legs were wobbling and she could barely walk.

By morning Kiki was worse and her hind legs were almost paralyzed. I called the Veterinarian and took her in. I spent my last moments with her hugging her and telling her that I was sorry I had to make such a retched decision and hoped that she understood, then I handed her over to the doctor.

I didn’t realize it at the time that only a few months earlier I lost my other cat, Felix, to the same symptoms. The only difference was that the Veterinarian recommended exploratory surgery because he kept throwing up and wouldn’t eat, and, he was terribly thirsty. A week later, during the second suggested operation, the Veterinarian called me and said there was nothing further that could be done and said it would be best to not bring him out of the anesthesia.

Unfortunately, there’s more. Less than a month after Kiki died, our dog, Oscar, came down with the same symptoms and had to be put to sleep.

Three pets, all the same age, had to be put to sleep because of the same symptoms and diagnosed with unknown causes.

Both cats were fed the special diet cat food that was recalled after their passing. Sadly, my dear Oscar had a bad habit of eating the cat’s food when no one was looking.

I didn’t realize that I was feeding my pets poisoned food until months after their deaths.

I'm so sorry.

I miss you guys so much.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YVONNE!

Supporting the HANDMADE Industry

JP Cabin Studio at Etsy.com

PHOTO IMAGES & NOTECARDS from the Portfolio of

Just Perfect! Studio

I DID IT!

NaNoWriMo Update - Six more Days!

My, my…my words! I have reached the 30 thousand-word count and I am going to reward this milestone with a trip to See’s Candy Store. I figure with all of the sitting-in-front-of-the-computer I have done and the expansion of my derrière because of it, I will be able to just walk into See’s, inhale a few whiffs, and then immediately leave so I will not be tempted to actually put a piece of chocolate in my mouth and take the chance of gaining any further weight for the sedentary month of November.

Oh the bliss of actually reaching the 50 thousand word goal! Some NaNo-ers have already exceeded the target word count and a few are way beyond the goal. Editing is not part of the game, yet. Just "write the words and the novel will come" is the mantra. As my plot has been altered several times, and the characters’ names have been changed over and over again so my friends and relatives will not be able to recognize each other, I am anxious to read what I have written since the first of November and see if I actually have a theme, or a plot, or if I even have something worthy that can be reduced into a short plausible story some day. We will see on the 30th of November won’t we?

Write on!

Be Still, Listen and Learn

With the devastating state of the world economy, a frightfully unsteady stock market, unending wars that are erupting and displacing thousands of people from a life they are accustomed to… impoverished or otherwise…a solution or even hope of recovery from the mess that we are in seems impossible. The negative news is overwhelming and mind-boggling.

What can we do to assist in this endeavor to turn things around when we feel so helpless and distressed ourselves? Do we even know where to begin?

As positive as I have tried to be, I found myself in the midst of this gloomy gloom recently when my Grandkids came over for a visit. Yes, I was down and out about the stock market, higher food prices and the fact that we would probably have to work well into our nineties before we could even think about retiring, but, I didn’t realize the impact I had on the Grandkids until one of them, age five, asked me if she could make my bed.

“Why do you want to make my bed?” I was embarrassed to inquire.

She calmly reminded me, “Because Grandma, you told us that the first thing we should do when we get up in the morning is to make our beds and the day will be a good one.”

That put me in my place.

I started making excuses as to exactly why my bed wasn’t made, offered to assist her in taking on this chore, handed her a five dollar bill and told her she could have my convertible when she was sixteen, and then continued to go on in an attempt to mask my embarrassment of laziness, lethargy, or whatever the problem was that I was trying so hard to cover up. (Cover up…not trying to be Freudian here.) I was truly thrown for a loop by the honesty of this little five year old.

In the first place, the reason I preached to my Grandchildren to make their beds when they got up in the morning was because of something I observed years ago when visiting my aged Grandparents.

One morning I observed my eighty-five year old Grandfather take care of my Grandmother who was failing mentally and physically. He was well aware that her time was limited.

When Grandma woke up he would help her get dressed and take her to the living room to her usual place on the sofa, bring her a cup of tea in her favourite teacup, comb her unruly hair out of her eyes, kiss her on cheek, and then he would make her bed.

Keeping the pain to himself, he struggled with his arthritic legs as he went back and forth on either side of the double bed, pulling the sheet and blankets up to the top of the mattress, then carefully folding them back one-fourth of the way while smoothing out all of the wrinkles that his old blue eyes could manage to find. He then unfolded Grandma’s cherished silk bedspread across the bed and neatly tucked her pillows under the top of the spread. With an arduous effort he picked up the three small decorative pillows that were set on the chair the night before, and carefully placed them against the headboard, patting the pillows as if fluffing them would make the situation brighter.

As I stood at the door and watched this man do something that at the time I felt was unnecessary, I thought to my self, what difference does it make if the bed is made or not? No one is going to see it and the door to the bedroom is always kept shut anyway.

I asked him, “Why don’t you let me make the bed and you can have your cup of coffee with Grandma?”

He simply said, “If I stop making the bed then I know I have given up.”

I totally understood what he was saying. Even the smallest positive task can keep a heart beating in the right direction.

I was ashamed that I had forgotten about this little lesson of faith and hope in times of adversity. I gave my Granddaughter a hug.

We have to be positive about the outcome of these difficult times. We must make our own beds and keep our own lives as tidy as possible and we must not judge others. No one is going to see that your bed is made but you and your curious relatives. But, there is always a good chance that someone else will benefit from your “good day”.

Well, it’s a start.

BLOG ACTION DAY

I missed Blog Action Day on October 15th but still want to support any effort that I can to help end world hunger. Please visit this list of organizations who are actively working to end hunger and poverty around the world. More than 11,800 bloggers are making their voices heard in support of the fight against poverty.

We are so fortunate to not have to think about where our next meal is coming from. Give it serious thought the next time you say, "I'm starving, what's for dinner?"